Nearly there

The departure from Kristiansand eventually happened more than 24 hours later than scheduled. The Spirit of Discovery now has 3 working engines and the technical staff - who have worked incredibly hard to resolve the problems - are still working on restarting the fourth. TSH and Diva are concerned about how the 'dirty fuel' was taken on in the first place.

Because of the delay, the berth at Dover is no longer available and disembarkation is now expected to  take place at around noon on Saturday in Portsmouth  instead of around 8 am on Friday in Dover. This must have created huge logistical problems for Saga on shore and onboard, as well as taxi drivers and guests on the next cruise and the current one. 

The 36 hour delay will be filled with food, drink and service. The North Sea is calm. 

Bonus holiday

 At 18:00, the expected departure time from Kristiansand, the Captain announced that the Spirit of Discovery had engine problems and could not sail. Further announcements over the evening and the following morning explained that 2 of the four engines had problems, probably caused by 'dirty fuel'.  Spare parts have been ordered from Germany. Diva hopes that the suppliers have not heard about the 'Rule Britannia' incident. (See blog post 'no ghosts')

It is now impossible to reach Dover by Friday morning and hence the arrival home is delayed by at least 24 hours. Guests have not been told what is happening about those booked on the next scheduled cruise, which is only 5 days long.

Diva has moved the home food delivery order time from Saturday to Sunday morning.

On the instructions for disembarkation, TSH and Diva were amazed to find that it seems that they are not sharing transport with the other 2 guests who live on the same avenue as they do.

A Regent Seven Seas ship had to find a new berth, as its booked one is indefinitely occupied by the Spirit of Discovery.  

Hamlet's Castle

 

a or u

Because of Storm Floris, it would not be safe to berth at Skagen, the next port on the itinerary. The captain announced the name of the replacement port and TSH and Diva heard it as Kristiansund. a port they are familiar with, but which is north of Bergen. Diva became concerned that the return journey would be long and that the Spirit of Discovery would arrive late in Dover, with consequences for their arrival time at home. When the written program arrived, they discovered that the call would be to Kristiansand, which is on the outskirts of Oslo and not a huge diversion for the return to Dover. 

For most of the journey, the seas have been so calm that it was not always obvious that the ship was moving. That all changed on the rocky journey to Kristiansand, so they took precautionary stugeron and the steward tied down the balcony chairs. The sail past 'Hamlet's castle' was just before dinner, so Diva was able to recite part of Horatio's speech, with TSH playing the minor role of Hamlet. 

The shower door failed again. Fortunately TSH is a keen observer and a quick learner, so he was able to perform the trick with the door seal without involving the steward. 

In Kristiansand, they intended to go into the town on the shuttle bus but because there were no tours at this hastily arranged stop, the queues were very long and they decided to stay onboard the Spirit of Discovery. 

3 way shuttle

The replacement call was to Copenhagen, which is not new to TSH and Diva. They took the shuttle bus and walked round  one of the main squares and the attractive Nyhaven area. The shuttle driver remarked that he had been driving shuttles for 35 years (!!) and had never before had 2 destinations. Saga had arranged a circular route so that guests could alight in the city or at the Little Mermaid before returning to the Spirit of Discovery. 

TSH and Diva were bemused when they left the ship and were heading right towards the port exit to hear another guest remark that 'yesterday we went to the left'. Well, yesterday they were in a different port, different cruise terminal, different exit. 

No ghosts

Storm Floris is not just a UK issue. Captain Kim Tanner announced that the call to Helsingor would not be possible. Going ashore was planned to be by tender and this operation would not be possible in the wind and choppy sea caused by Floris. Diva totally agreed with this decision on health and safety grounds but was disappointed that she would not get to recite the lines from Hamlet which she has been memorising for the occasion. 'yet once methought it lifted up its head ......'.

She was less pleased with the Captain's behaviour on leaving Warnemunde in what he persistently referred to as 'sausage land'. He played 'Rule Britannia' very loudly as the Spirit of Discovery was waved off by (presumably) friendly local people. OK in UK but very jingoistic for our European friends. TSH and Diva were mortified.

Eating all the time

 

They missed the rainstorms in Riga by taking their walk early - some guests who went out later were thoroughly drenched. The weather in Warnemunde was grey and drizzly but this is the first unpleasant weather that TSH and Diva have encountered on this trip. Warnemunde is a pleasant coastal town with attractive riverside walks, as well as a railway but no steam locomotives.

The shower door in the suite refused to open, so Diva called the butler, who said he would send the steward  to assess it before the joiner was summoned. In case the guests are too decrepit to operate the shower door? The multi-talented steward yanked off the door seal, repositioned the door and reapplied the seal to correct the situation. Diva thanked him and asked if he would like to live with her.

The food continues to be good and they especially like the roast duck in 'East meets West'. The cookies are brilliant and every bit as good as those on Silversea. The roast beef for Sunday lunch was cut from a joint bigger than any they have ever seen before. It was mind-boggling to imagine the size of the cow it came from.  Some of the combinations can be bizarre - a breakfast muffin with creamed spinach and fried egg and another with scrambled egg and avocado soldiers.  One item on the dinner menu is 'clapshot pie'!

Accident report

Diva was invited to a meeting with the Spirit of Discovery Guest Services Director. She was able to greet him as a hero, as he was the person who 'sorted out' TSH's ipad when it was new and they did not know how to deal with its demands.  He was able to assure her that the Incident with The Door had been recorded and that all the proper procedures had been followed. 'It is a matter of international maritime law that the decks are open when the wind speed is less than 35 kmph'. He said that he would not offer a bottle of wine as the butler had already made adequate provision but that he would offer a 'free' massage to help with the residual soreness. Diva politely refused  this, as she has encountered the spa staff before and they are brutal. 

The Spirit of Discovery is currently in the south Baltic Sea. Some guests claim to have caught sight of a Russian submarine but this is an unverified report.

Photoblog (2)

 

The day of the Griffin

 

Diva forgot to mention that in Tallinn they passed an office labelled Malware Bytes. Turns out it is a perfectly respectable cyber security company but it is not a name she would have chosen.

Riga is a lively place with many local people around the city - not just shuffling Saga pensioners this time. Lots of cafes with loud music. TSH and Diva saw a group of young men on a large cycle with beer provided. Singing loudly and having a great time (the men, not TSH and Diva).

In TSH's world, there is no crisis that cannot be solved by use of half a box of tissues. So when an unfriendly bird made a deposit on Diva's sparkly shoes, he was ready for an instant clean-up. Diva has two pairs of sparkly shoes with her. Both receive many compliments from passing guests and crew.

As usual, TSH and Diva attempted the Saga morning crossword. One of the clues 'Great venture' evaded them until they traded solutions with other guests. Turns out there was a misprint, the clue should have been 'Great vulture' and the answer was 'Griffin' - a word that Diva had thought of but could not connect to 'venture'. 

Jeosh, their butler, read their mid-cruise questionnaire and came to enquire about Diva's well-being. More than the safety officer has bothered to do so far. 

Fizz

 Leaving Stockholm, TSH played ABBA music.

In Tallinn, TSH and Diva took the shuttle bus into town. Apart from the extremely hot weather - 28 degrees C - they had a very pleasant walk round the old town. They saw a Scottish pub as well as the compulsory 'Mad Murphy's'. 

They met a guest wearing a T-shirt with some of the words of 'Imagine'. '....all the people, living life in peace....' Whatever would John think of the world now?

And what would Paul think of being described as 'the Beatles' bass guitarist' in a news item in 'Britain Today'.

Regular readers may remember that on a previous visit to the East meets West restaurant, TSH gave the waiter instructions on how to pour beer. Clearly this knowledge was not passed on, as the waiter this time just tipped the beer into the glass, creating copious foam. TSH was, however, shocked when opening a bottle of English sparkling wine in the suite. Even though the bottle had been resting in the fridge for many days, the cork flew off immediately, hitting the ceiling with some force. 

Here we go Again

 

On going ashore in Stockholm, TSH and Diva were greeted with the sounds of ‘Mamma Mia’. Other people on the shuttle bus had remembered to pick up a paper map but judging by the resultant conversations, most were not able to make much use of them.

At one stage, Diva noted the turn they needed to make to get back to the shuttle bus. On the corner was a café called ‘Brod & Salt’. Only later did they discover that it was part of a chain with branches all over the city. TSH proved to be a good guide, as he had been to Stockholm a number of times before. He also had somehow managed to secure Werthers Originals to hand out on the way back to the Spirit of Discovery.

Diva has a lot of sore muscles but no headache.

On return to the Spirit of Discovery, the music had been changed to ‘When all is said and done……its time to pay the bill’.

Diva melts down

 

TSH and Diva decided not to go ashore in Visby because of the driving rain and high winds. Especially since the Captain had advised people going ashore to walk carefully down the middle of the pier as otherwise they risked being swept off their feet.

Instead they went for a walk around the promenade deck. When they decided to go back inside, the heavy door was caught by the wind, collided with Diva and swept her off her feet. She banged her head and shoulders.

The result was attendance by the Guest Services Manager, followed by a nurse with a wheelchair. The rest did not go well. The emphasis was on Diva signing forms which she was not expected to read. She read them, did not sign them and as a result (she thinks), no doctor was called. Her blood pressure was taken and found to be high even by her standards. She eventually returned to her cabin and is so far ok but concerned about possible consequences of the blow to her head.

Crazy Captain

 

There are not many announcements on Saga ships, so TSH and Diva knew that it was not good news when there was an announcement from the Captain during breakfast. The port of Visby was currently closed and the Princess which was to dock alongside the Spirit of Discovery had already left the area. This was due to high winds and a choppier sea than they have so far seen on this holiday.

But the Saga risk-taking captain had decided to persuade the authorities to reopen the port for his vessel so that the scheduled tours could proceed. Diva was shocked by the attitude and felt very uneasy.

Victory

The destination lecturer is good but Diva was terrified by some of his pictures for Riga. He spoke about the regional wildlife and showed close up pictures of wolf and lynx. The Golden Oriole was pretty. 

Before dinner, TSH and Diva hosted drinks and nibbles for two friends who live near their home. Their butler - one of the best they have ever had on Saga or Silversea - set up the table, including champagne on ice.

On formal night in the Grand Dining Room, many guests were looking at their phones during the Euro 25 final match. A cheer from the first table to spot the victory spread round the room. A table near to TSH and Diva were late to the realisation of what had happened but did their own cheer some minutes later. 

Diva is glad she is not tall

 In Gothenburg, TSH and Diva took an excursion which gave views of the attractive buildings, old and new, including the extremely tall building where it is claimed that the luxury apartments can cost            £6 million. For a flat in a high rise in a city!! Part of the excursion was a ride on a canal boat, which gave a different perspective on Gothenburg. But the bridges the boat passed under were so low that everyone instinctively ducked. This moved the excursion into Diva's white knuckle category; The guide stood on a high part at the front facing his audience. He deliberately left it to the last minute to sit down for each bridge but he was disappointed if he expected screams instead of murmurs from the phlegmatic British travellers.

Diva has always suspected she has some Viking ancestry and this was confirmed when they passed Banana Quay and were told that Sweden imports more bananas per capita than anywhere else in Europe.

Another guest told them that the traffic problems around Dover (the ones which disrupted the shuttle buses and stopped them going into the centre) had combined with motorway problems elsewhere to result in some guests from the north-west of England failing to arrive before sail-away. The Spirit of Discovery waited for them as long as possible but eventually had to leave. They were offered a full refund or a night in Dover and 2 flights to catch up with the cruise in Gothenburg. What a nightmare!

The lecturers on Enchanting Scandinavia are just as good as the ones on the previous cruise to Norway.

The Living Room has a cake supporting the Lionesses in Euro 2025.

 

It's a draw!!

The Spirit of Discovery is now back in Dover to disembark one set of guests and welcome the newcomers. TSH and Diva are among the lucky few who are staying onboard. It is surprising how many guests are amazed that 'back to back' is possible. They cannot imagine that there was a cruise before or after their own! They have not worked out that 5% discounts are involved. 

The day in Dover was a little difficult. The plan was to do into Dover using the advertised shuttle bus, which failed to materialise. There appeared to be serious traffic issues in the area and they were concerned that if they made it to Dover they might not easily get back. They stayed onboard and walked around the promenade deck instead.

It has already been recorded that Diva broke a tea-pot in the Britannia lounge. TSH has evened up the score by breaking a wine glass (empty). This happened in the morning and no alcohol was involved in the incident. Diva left a warning sign for the cabin steward, to avoid any injuries.

Photoblog

 

Let there be light

In the morning, TSH and Diva were busy with the sudoku and the crossword in the Living Room when the lights were dimmed so that their aging eyes were struggling to read. Diva asked for them to be turned up again. It turns out that the 'system' can only provide a fixed amount of light (a quantum?)  and if the LR is bright, the jewellery shop is not sufficiently bright to sparkle the diamonds. Guest Services assured her that an electrician would be called but there was no apparent action that morning.

Diva has discovered the 'Slow Horses' novels. She is only on the first one but is impressed.

TSH had fish, chips and mushy peas for lunch. Followed by sticky toffee pudding. 

The weather is now grey but the North Sea is very smooth. 

Diva and the Ironing Board

These are not words which are often used in conjunction. But Diva decided her linen dresses needed ironing and she set out to Deck 10 launderette, where she found two ironing boards neatly attached to the walls. There were instructions as to how to set them down but she failed to work out which lever was referred to, let alone how to twist, pull or push it. So she headed to Deck 8 launderette, where she was lucky enough to meet a woman who had clearly mastered the technique and was prepared to set the other board down for Diva's use. Total humiliation for a Chartered Engineer. But it was not that kind of engineering.

The ship layout is still confusing for both TSH and Diva but on this voyage they have so far beaten the phones into submission and the time change has gone smoothly, with no reversion to some other zone.

In other news, the weather remains warm, the seas calm and there has been no rain!! The fjord scenery has been stunning, especially in the bright clear light. The only disadvantage of the deep narrow fjords is the occasional absence of TV and Internet.

 Following his stroke and his vision problems, TSH has struggled with paper sudoku and he has restricted himself to those available on his Ipad. He would like it recorded that on this cruise he has completed several of the Saga-supplied paper puzzles, as well as visiting the Grill buffet on his own a number of times. Mostly for desserts.

There is a crack

 In Skjolden, Diva studied some movements on the water on the opposite side of the fjord. She was convinced that she was watching a pod of whales occasionally surfacing and showing a flash of white.  TSH maintained that it was a group of birds and when he saw one of them fly off, he presented this as evidence that he was right.

Food continues to be excellent. The duck in East to West is very special and the Norwegian buffet evening presented lots of interesting choices, including venison meatballs and a cocktail called Viking Scream. Diva has discovered that the cookies in the Living Room are far more to her taste than the lunch-time Grill offering of creamy desserts, so the Living Room is where they now have their after lunch tea and hot chocolate.  They are still welcome in the Living Room – perhaps less so in the Britannia lounge, where Diva accidentally tipped up the table, sending many items to the floor. The tea pot was broken and the tea bag made a serious stain on the carpet.  TSH was relieved that he was not involved in the incident.

Standing Room only

 

Saga run an excursion ‘system’ which has participants meeting on board to be allocated a bus number. The trick is to match the number of people with the number of seats on the bus.    TSH and Diva were allocated to bus 13, only to find that there were 6 more people than seats. There was much consternation and recounting and it was suggested that the ‘surplus’ guests should stand until a meeting with another bus. Health and Safety? Eventually this suggestion was dropped and bus 12 was recalled. TSH and Diva were looked at disapprovingly (and sometimes scolded) by those already on bus 12, who just assumed they were late and had caused significant delay to their excursion. No member of crew bothered to explain otherwise.  Diva has explained her fury to the excursion manager.

The highlight of the excursion was the traditional Saga handout of Werthers originals.

Visit to the rainy port

The daily program said that the gangway would be on Deck 4 forward. TSH and Diva have cruised enough times to know that this means 'towards the pointy end'.  But they have not been on Spirit of Discovery often enough to be confident where that is and which way they should turn when leaving their suite. Especially when the ship had taken a tortuous path in its approach to the dock, appearing to make a complete about turn at one point. So when they emerged from the lift on Deck 4 (with other guests - it was not just them) they were met with empty corridors and no sign of an exit. They met a shocked crew member who was relieved to direct them away from the crew area. They had to return to Deck 5 and descend using the correct stairs at the other end of the Spirit of Discovery.

It is a well known fact that it always rains in Bergen. Except when it is 28 degrees C and sunny and TSH and Diva are visiting.  The heat was relentless in a way that was totally unexpected in Norway. So this was a brief visit, although they found some shady alleyways of quaint old wooden buildings that they had not encountered before. They were relieved to return to the air conditioning of the ship. Large glasses of water before lunch.

An excellent start

The drive from home to Dover was fast and comfortable, with only 2 brief stops to collect other guests and to allow Diva to eat her bananas at the motorway services. Embarkation was efficient and the prosecco at lunch very welcome. At the safety muster there was a temporary panic from Diva and a feeling of smugness from TSH, as she could not immediately find her ship card. She eventually dug it out of her bag, deflating TSH, who really did forget his card on a previous muster occasion. They chatted with a guest who had never been on a cruise before. She kept muttering about Titanic (a banned word on most ships) and the orchestra going down with the ship. 

Saga allocate everyone a restaurant booking to avoid confusion on the first night of a cruise and TSH and Diva were a little apprehensive to be sent to La Vie en Rose - a French-style restaurant which is new to the Spirit of Discovery. It replaces the Club, which was one of their favourites. Worry was unnecessary. They were greeted with large glasses of Kir Royale. Diva does not normally drink cocktails. She prefers to know exactly what she is drinking and large glasses of red wine normally satisfy demand. She now loves Kir Royale and will be requesting it forever. As well as red wine. They ate goat cheese salad, steak (TSH), duck a l'orange (Diva) and excellent lemon tart. Service was excellent and red wine plentiful. The new restaurant is a success.

The suite is now well organised and stocked by the butler with the requested drinks. The North Sea is exceptionally calm, although they met one guest who is already wearing wrist bands. How will she cope in a choppy sea?

Not a holiday

 

Normally this blog is just for holidays but Diva and TSH’s venture to their local Marks and Spencer is worth a mention. They went because of an enticing email about large discounts on fashion and beauty.

On arrival, they went to the Café and attempted to order 2 hot drinks and 2 bacon ciabattas, using the newly installed screens. On the first attempt, the screen said only one ciabatta was ordered, so Diva went back and changed the order to 2. Which showed correctly on the summary screen. When 4 bacon ciabattas arrived at their table, the waitress was kind and helpful in taking 2 of them back and arranging for a refund. Diva said that she had checked the screen very carefully and that this must be a frequent error which affected many people. She was assured that it had never happened before.

Whilst trying to drink her tea, Diva managed to spill much of it down her dress, which fortunately had a complex pattern which did not show the stain. But Diva was soaked to the skin.

When TSH and Diva arrived home, there was further communication from Silversea about a cruise they have booked for 2026. At different times they have been told it is cancelled, partially cancelled, chartered and re-routed. Further news is expected to arrive next week.

The discounts on beauty products were very limited and did not include anything Diva wanted to buy.

Late, late, late

Diva is not good with the unexpected, especially when it involves time-keeping. 4 hours late docking in Portsmouth, 3.5 hours late leaving the Spirit of Discovery and 4 hours later than expected arriving home. So when the assistant cruise director decided to 'entertain' the guests waiting in their designated lounge, it did not go well. He told a series of misogynistic jokes and Diva used a loud voice to inform the people around her that this was totally unacceptable and the root of unequal pay and opportunity. She was gratified to find several people nodding and voicing agreement. He would not have dared to make the equivalent racist jokes and although he will not change his behaviour she has sowed the seed of objection in at least a few peoples' minds.

Portsmouth disembarkation was long and tedious and they had to transport their own luggage over quite a distance. Very unlike Dover, where there were many porters with trolleys to assist. 

Not a good last day. TSH was so tired when he got home that he forgot to check whether the wood-chippings he had ordered to be laid in the garden were in place or not. (They were)

TSH would like it recorded that he tried most of the ice cream flavours available - lemon curd, mince pie, rocky road.

Later and later

The third formal night offered the usual good dinner and both TSH and Diva ate beef wellington and crepes suzettes. The previous night in East meets West, TSH gave lessons in beer pouring. The waiter hurled (no other word for it) the beer into the glass so that the foam head filled the space. He then went to fetch a spoon and had to be stopped from removing the foam!! TSH demonstrated the correct method of pouring gently against the side of the glass but was unconvinced that the waiter really understood. 

Lost in translation .... Some guests had a problem with the rubber seal on the balcony door and rang to say there was a draught. 'So there is a problem with the air-conditioning?' 'No, the rubber seal has perished'. 'Your door is broken?' 'No, it is just the seal'. First the air-conditioning engineer arrived and then the joiner, before they rang Reception to contact the door seal expert.

TSH and Diva are beginning to understand why the ship has been moving comparatively slowly and why the Captain has been so cautious in denying access to the upper decks. During the rough passage a few nights ago, a freak wave hit the ship and many guests were thrown to the floor on Deck 12. Broken hip, broken femur ......... Saga clearly do not want to risk a repetition.

The Bay of Biscay - in both directions - has been completely smooth.

The horses have been encouraged to sail as fast as possible but they are not able to reach Portsmouth for the planned docking time of around 7:00. The new plan is for arrival in Portsmouth around 11:00, with TSH and Diva disembarking around mid-day. So Diva's hopes of an afternoon at home with the washing machine are dashed. And the Sainsbury order is rescheduled for Thursday. 

Helping to drive the ship

 With improved (but not entirely smooth) weather conditions, the bridge tour was able to take place. TSH and Diva were instructed not to disturb the officers, not to interrupt the explanations and above all not to touch anything. When it was time for questions, there were several pointed ones about how collisions were avoided and how much damage the ship sustained during the serious incident in the Bay of Biscay about 2 years ago. The incident is still the subject of an inquiry and the officer quite rightly refused to discuss it. The Captain interjected to say that maybe they could ask the Captain who was in charge of the ship at the time - a neat way of making it quite clear that it was not him. 

Data that was provided indicated that the ship's tolerance for swell was around 9m. Also that the ship has 7m below the water and 49m above. The Spirit of Discovery is going into dry dock soon in order to be in top condition for TSH and Diva's next cruise in July.

The officer cleared up something TSH and Diva have always wondered about. When a pilot is onboard, it is in an advisory capacity and the Captain still has responsibility for the ship, the crew and the guests and hence has the final say. 

Because of strong headwinds, the Spirit of Discovery is proceeding slower than is ideal and contingency plans are being made for a late arrival in Portsmouth. TSH and Diva hope that these plans are not needed. They are scheduled to leave at the ship at 8:20 and have booked a late afternoon Sainsbury's delivery. The Captain has instructed the Chief Engineer to make all his horses run as fast as possible.

TSH ate Manchester Tart at dinner. Diva has always lived within a few miles of Manchester and has never heard of it. 

Weather woes

 The first sign of trouble was the phone call from Reception explaining that their Sunday afternoon bridge visit was postponed 'because of expected weather conditions'. Then the Captain announced that there would be 24 hours of choppy seas and he was closing the restaurant and lounge on the higher decks. Then the movements of the ship started, so it was difficult to walk around. Guests with cabins on the higher decks had items broken because of the sudden lurches. After 24 hours, the Captain extended the restrictions because the headwinds had slowed progress through the weather system. TSH and Diva have good sea legs and plenty of stugeron. 

The precautions are probably because of a number of injuries during the choppy seas a few days ago. A former Captain in the Merchant Navy fell and injured his back and there are rumours of a broken hip. 

The restaurant manager is often at the entrance to greet TSH and Diva and sometimes escorts them personally to their table. 

Fish with bananas

In the morning, the Captain once more apologised for the weather being rougher than he had predicted. 'Have a drink on me! - as long as it is from the complementary selection'. 

The Restaurant Manager approached TSH and Diva at breakfast to check that all was well. He pointed out that there would be a Portuguese buffet in the evening at the Grill restaurant. This would be difficult for TSH because of his sight problems, so they were assured that pasteis de nata - a favourite of theirs - would be delivered to their table in the Grand Dining Room. It will be interesting to discover if the waiters in the GDR are aware of this special arrangement. The waiters are taking great care of them. Perhaps they appreciated Diva being very discreet when she was breakfasting with the Restaurant Manager and she had to point out that they had brought her the wrong kind of tea.

Like the Canary Islands,  Madeira is volcanic, with dramatic mountains, but its vegetation is much more luxuriant. On the quayside, there is a prominent museum dedicated to Cristiano Ronaldo (a footballer). On the excursion, the guide explained that fish cooked with bananas was a very popular local dish. TSH and Diva were served with Poncha - a traditional Madeira drink based on rum - at 10:00 in the morning.

It is disappointing that so far on this voyage there have been no sightings of whales or dolphins. But there were many camels on Tenerife - their job was to take tourists up the mountain. TSH and Diva did not ride on a camel.

Bananas and Potatoes

 TSH and Diva watched the sail-away from Tenerife in order to get a good view of the dramatic rocky scenery. The departure was, unusually, assisted by a tug because of the strong winds. The captain announced that the Spirit of Discovery would be taking a short detour into international waters in order to 'feed the fish'. 

In Santa Cruz de La Palma, they took a short tour which gave Diva a white-knuckle ride along the twisty mountain roads with steep unfenced drops at the side. They had good views of a massive volcanic caldera with their viewing position higher than the drifting clouds. The guide was confusing in her descriptions and her indication of which direction guests should look in was given by her raised arm which was invisible from many seats on the bus. She emphasised the drama of the route but she was the only person shrieking at the sharp bends.  She also asked guests to inform the driver if another bus was approaching along the narrow roads. Not sure what he thought of that.

TSH took many photographs to provide him with an occupation of deleting and editing in the afternoon. Another guest was taking photographs with a tablet with the sound instructions played at a high volume. 

Some guests are talking a lot about the rough seas encountered during some nights but this has not been at a level to bother TSH and Diva.

Diva's brightly coloured jacket was admired. The restaurant manager checked that TSH and Diva were happy with their lunch.

The main crops on La Palma are bananas and potatoes.

Diva has a new BFF

 On the mid-cruise questionnaire, Diva gave a poor mark for service in the restaurants. Many people are remarking on this and guessing that crew numbers have been reduced and that there are many new crew onboard. Everyone seems to be working hard but service is often slow and inaccurate. 

Maybe Diva was the only person to make a point of this on the questionnaire. She received a phone call from the Restaurant Manager, who wished to have breakfast with her to discuss the issues. This resulted in a constructive dialogue between him and TSH and Diva. He is committed to improving the service. 

TSH and Diva are now receiving a lot of attention from crew members. 

Hot rocks

On the second formal night, all the guests appeared to have made an effort to look smart and many - including TSH and Diva - were in formal dress.  Medals are encouraged and one guest was seen wearing his. There is probably a higher percentage in formal dress than is usual on Silversea in recent years. As on most evenings of this cruise, TSH drank a glass of white wine as part of his rehabilitation from his stroke.

Canapes are delivered to the suites in the late afternoon and Diva has been sending pictures of them to the family Whatsapp. Comments include: 'Is it the same garnish every day with different bases?' 'Have they run out of caviar and switched to Branston pickle because it looks close enough?' 'Ran out of Branston as well today?'

When TSH and Diva were in Lanzarote observing the 'geothermic anomalies', they were handed some hot stones from a volcanic area. Diva dropped hers immediately, as they were too hot (about 80 degrees C). But she since discovered that TSH kept his as a souvenir. He has them wrapped in a tissue but they have cooled down.

On the way back to the Spirit of Discovery' they were offered Werners Originals - a classic Saga touch. 

Rocking up to the volcanoes

The ship was very unstable during the evening and night and TSH and Diva were pleased to be dining on Deck 5, although even there a large pile of crockery slid onto the floor and broke. On Deck 12, the movement was even greater and a Code Alpha call was made after someone fell over and hurt themselves. A stretcher party was eventually needed. The evening of Irish music was cancelled on safety grounds. Diva's green jacket was well received at dinner and people asked if she was Irish. Does a fraction count?

In the morning the Captain said that the weather had been worse than forecast and apologised for inadequate warnings.

TSH had been unable to complete the previous day's sudoku - a great blow to his pride. He felt vindicated when the solution appeared with an error in it. 2 '1's in the same square indicated that there was something badly wrong with the puzzle itself. 

In Lanzarote, TSH and Diva went on an excursion to the Timanfaya National Park to see the impressive volcanic landscape. They were able to taste local wine and also attended  a talk on the health giving properties of the Aloe Vera plant. 

The wearing of the green

 It is St Patricks day and there is a special cake in the Living Room. The cupcakes are decorated in green. The food continues to be good and the morning fruit salad is almost as good as the one TSH makes at home.

The sea has been more choppy and the Captain has decided to take a slightly longer route - hugging the African coast - to avoid the 8m swell in the centre of the depression. Diva has issued stugeron tablets. This is an interesting Captain, he is ex Royal Navy but hopefully his submariner skills will not be needed on this voyage. 

Some of the guests are confused by marine terminology. One asked his partner if their cabin was on the port or the starboard side. 'We are on the starboard', 'But we can't be. Because we could see the cranes when we were in port. That must be the port side'. 

Several guests have mentioned the Herman's Hermits performance and how much they enjoyed it. TSH and Diva have kept their own counsel.

The clocks have changed again. TSH has no idea why. And although they have switched off automatic time change on their phones, the phones seem to be making independent decisions about the time changes. 

TSH is pleased that he is becoming more familiar with the layout of the Spirit of Discovery and has successfully made a few short journeys alone,

Diva will wear her green jacket for dinner.

Rain in Cadiz

 TSH and Diva had already cancelled their coach tour, as they decided that they would enjoy walking around Cadiz on their own.  After a good breakfast, TSH sat on the balcony in the sun for a while. By the time they got to the gangway, the sun was gone and the heavens had opened. They only made it as far as the terminal building before they returned to the ship. The weather improved in the afternoon, so they took a short walk to the cathedral. A carnival was taking place and there was a lot of street theatre and people dressed in the sort of crazy costumes that the British reserve for Christmas and hen parties. 

TSH and Diva have mostly been impressed with the hygiene arrangements on the Spirit of Discovery. There are sanitisers everywhere and compulsory hand-washing on the way into buffets. All of the security staff have so far managed to scan their ship cards without needing to touch them. But one woman grabbed Diva's card and said that was the only way she could scan it. She looked totally blank in the face of Diva's protestations about the spreading of disease. In the unthinkable event that Diva catches norovirus, there will be a formal complaint.

TSH has started to take photographs.

First World problems

 The clean laundry was not delivered during the afternoon, as is usual, and there is no spare laundry bag, so TSH and Diva had to contact the butler again. The laundry appeared after dinner, the new dirty laundry was placed outside the door and there is now a spare bag for future use. 

The packing has proved comprehensive this time but Diva wished they had brought their Lakeland Sticky Stuff Remover. Her tube of foundation had a label which has proved impossible to remove by any other method. Inelegant.

Diva was unable to log into the ship internet to write this blog, so she thought she would write it in Word and cut and paste it in later. But Microsoft wanted her to log in and could not authenticate her without the internet. It would not even allow the use of Onenote. Is this organisation some sort of global domination monopoly? Don't answer that. 

The hair dryer supplied in the suite was designed and sourced by people who had never used a hair dryer. A button had to be continually depressed during use but its position was such that the manual skills to hold the button, hold the dryer itself and manipulate the hair brush were far beyond Diva's capabilities. A chat with a helpful woman on Reception resulted in a replacement dryer - there is still a button which must be held throughout but it seems easier to use. 

Banana soup

 Another day at sea, another 2 destination lectures and 'Murder most foul' from the geographic profiler. TSH and Diva are far too dignified to join in with line dancing but they were in the lounge where it was taking place. 'Achy breaky heart' went well but it was only during the Irish 'I'll tell my Ma when I get home' that the clapping and whoopping really get going. 

At lunch, a nearby Welsh woman tried to recruit a tall muscular waiter for her national rugby team but he assured her that he only played basket ball.

TSH and Diva watched the evening entertainment from the comfort of the suite. 'An evening with Herman's Hermits' featured only one of the original group and neither the vocals or the instrumentation was impressive. Finishing with an encore of 'I'm 'Enery the eighth  I am' did not strike an authentic note.

The time change went smoothly on this occasion, as automatic time change has been disabled on both phones and manual time setting turned out to work well. 

Dinner for both TSH and Diva was Chateaubriand, which both enjoyed. Despite Diva's love of bananas they both passed on the cold banana and Baileys soup (a starter, not a dessert!!).

Across The Bay

The notoriously choppy Bay of Biscay is smooth for TSH and Diva. Everyone now has all their bags - some guests had to have their first dinner in their travel clothes because the luggage had not been distributed. TSH and Diva were lucky to have had their clothes bags in time for their first major appearance.

The Spirit of Discovery is up-to date and has a button by the door to indicate 'do not disturb'. Next to it is another button saying 'make up room'. Diva was very excited and thought that this was a special place for applying her cosmetics. She had read the emphasis wrongly - it was an invitation for the cleaner to enter.

The day was leisurely - walks around the promenade deck, a lecture about Cadiz and another about the geology of Madeira. Both excellent speakers. The third talk - also excellent - was different from any other cruise ship talk. It started with a trigger warning about the violent and upsetting content.  The speaker was a Geographic Profiler who worked with the police to solve serious crime. The basis of the work was concerned with correlating the locations important to the criminal's life with the locations involved in the crime. He discussed several well-known crimes that he had worked on. Some police officers think that this work is more helpful than that of criminal profilers. 

TSH and Diva confirmed that Saga, like Silversea, will offer other complementary wines if the wine of the day is not acceptable to a guest. They were very impressed when the people at a nearby table tried to order 'paid for wine' and the waiter dissuaded them by offering a wide range of alternative complementary wines. 

TSH has so far taken no photographs.

Hard day's start

Tony the SAGA  driver remained cheerful throughout the long journey to Portsmouth. Despite being gutted the previous night at Anfield, where he saw Liverpool drop out of the UEFA Champions League. A short stop at Warwick services provided the opportunity for TSH and Diva to eat the bananas.

Embarkation was not as smooth as they had experienced at Dover. More queues and outdoor in the cold for a while.  Diva had her photo (for ship id)  taken twice because she closed her eyes the first time. A well known trait. A quick lunch was followed by going to the cabin to await the lugage. 2 of the 3 suitcases soon arrived but the 3rd did not appear until later in the evening. Diva went to reception before sailing so that they could assure her that the bag was onboard.   Moisturiser, hair styling products, shaving equipment ........ She had tried to telephone reception but there is no telephone directory and the butler's card did not contain a number. The reception number is listed on the television if you can find the right number but so far Diva had not had the time to work this out. 

Safety drill went smoothly as TSH remembered his card and no torches were involved for Diva to test.

Dinner had been arranged for TSH and Diva in the East meets West restaurant  and the meal was excellent. Diva wanted a nightcap in the cabin and was pleased that the butler had provided Merlot, as requested. But it had a cork and the butler had to be summoned to provide a corkscrew. Another baby butler to be trained.

Are we nearly there yet?

 The cruise clothes are on the planning rails and the toiletries are laid out on the spare room desk. TSH has put out his dinner suit, which he accidentally left behind on his last cruise. The suitcases are ready and TSH and Diva have both had their hair appointments. Diva's nail appointment was cancelled because she developed a very bad back, which meant that she could not attend. Fortunately things are now improving but her nails are still bare.

At home, fresh food is dwindling and Diva has suggested she might count the remaining tomatoes and divide by the number of lunches to work out the portion sizes. There will be no more food deliveries but there could be an emergency visit to Sainsburys to top up. There are enough bananas for sustenance on the journey to Portsmouth. 

TSH is pleased with himself because his garden improvement program is running to schedule and a short holiday is possible.