Hacker alert

 Diva was shocked when she looked at her phone in the morning. A red warning message from McAfee stating that the onboard wifi has been hacked and she should disconnect immediately. Although they realised it was probably a false alarm, in the light of recent events, they informed Reception, who sent the butler to ‘sort out the phone’. Diva insisted on speaking to an IT person and one eventually appeared and explained that this message was connected with O2, whose service appeared to be confused by the satellite communication from Florida. This was a less than satisfactory explanation in many ways but Diva decided to accept the false alarm diagnosis, whilst being relieved that TSH, unlike some other guests, is not doing banking transactions from the ship.

The IT has improved but is still not reliable and the TV has also been unavailable at times.

TSH and Diva took an excursion on Orkney to see some of the ancient remains, especially the Ring of Brodgar, which is very atmospheric. That evening was Venetian night and they were surprised to be invited to dine with Captain Arma. There were many cruisers with many more days, so it was unclear why they were singled out for this honour. It was a pleasant table of 5 people and both TSH and Diva ate the excellent filet mignon. Captain Arma explained that neither he nor the doctor is allowed to be ill as they are the two people legally required for ship operation.

At breakfast, a nearby guest ordered his eggs ‘broken’. ‘Scrambled?’ asked the waiter. ‘No, broken.’ ‘Sunny side up?’ ‘No, broken.’ Turns out broken is something to do with mushing up the yolk whilst leaving the white intact. On what planet of the spoiled incompetent can grown men not mush up their own yolks? A power game.

Wildlife sightings:  Cormorants, swans, greylag geese, sheep, Aberdeen Angus, highland cattle (predominant colour used to be black but Queen Victoria liked the red ones, so breeding proceeded accordingly and now the predominant colour is red).

 

 

Life ashore

 

TSH and Diva walked around Falmouth but did not go ashore in Fishguard, because there was a long tender which was not properly available until 11:00. It seems to have been a good decision as there is very little there, many shops are boarded up and there was only limited access to the tapestry which is the main ‘attraction’ of the town.

In Belfast they visited the Titanic museum – their second visit, but still very much worth doing. There were limited numbers of visitors and so no problems with social distancing. In Oban, they went on their first excursion – to a nearby garden run by National Trust of Scotland. The garden was moving into its autumn state but there were pleasant walks and excellent viewpoints. It was a first to see a dog being pushed along in a child’s buggy with no actual child in sight. The sail-away from Oban was extremely scenic and comparable with a Norwegian fjord.

In Stornoway, the plan was for anchor and tender but TSH and Diva knew it was all cancelled when Captain Arma’s voice could be heard at 8:00. Due to the heavy swell, tendering would not be safe. The cruise director then announced an exciting new programme for the day. When TSH and Diva were movers and shakers at work, no-one would have guessed that their retirement excitement would involve napkin folding. They will not be attending this event.

Wildlife sightings: A few gannets (on and off the ship), white horses on the sea and llamas in a field.

Photoblog 1

 

Dressed for dinner, lemon meringue, Silver Spirit

All change?

 

Silversea’s overlords at Royal Caribbean have decided to rebrand them. At the moment, this appears to be limited to the external appearance of the ships. The bottom section has been painted in what Diva assumed was undercoat, looks like battleship grey and is apparently meant to be silver. The logo on the funnel has changed so that it looks washed out – as if someone put white undercoat across it. There has been no official mention of this onboard – TSH and Diva asked the HR manager about it when they were chatting with her. They think it is a huge mistake.

The HR manager also described the logistics of the last 16 months. Getting as many crew as possible home - sometimes using the ships as ferries, preparing to help with evacuations from the Australian wild fires, assembling quarantined and vaccinated crew, dry runs to prepare the restaurant staff for the return of guests. The latter involved filling each restaurant in turn with non-restaurant crew such as cleaners and deck hands, who all enjoyed the new experience of being waited on.

The passengers are still trying to help out. During a lighting issue in the theatre when the lecturer could not read his notes, a passenger offered him her phone torch. It was politely refused. The lecturer – Peter Crimes – was a PhD student in the Geology department at Liverpool University when Diva, in her first job, worked on the Computer Helpdesk.

Weather misty but not too cold and the sea is very flat.

Wildlife sightings: 1 rabbit, 1 egret, 2 cormorants.

 

Life on Board

 

The crew are determined to make this a successful cruise. There seem to be more of them than ever before and they are attentive and cheerful to an even greater extent than before. Captain Arma says that there is a full ship of guests and a normal number of crew. Other sources suggest about two thirds the number of guests and observation suggests more than the usual number of crew. There are a number of guests who are regular cruisers with other lines such as Cunard and Azamara.

The food is well up to standard, including ‘the best Danish pastries in the world’ (TSH). Afternoon tea is no more but the Arts café has food, including sandwiches and cakes, throughout the day. La Terrazza is still buffet style for breakfast and lunch but guests indicate what they want and waiters put the food onto the plate. Thus far, TSH and Diva have not been there at busy times, so it has worked well for them.

The IT situation has been badly affected by the general IT outage at Silversea (almost 2 weeks now). Internet and TV are intermittent. For the first day or two there were no puzzles and no country news sheets.

Captain’s Welcome was held in the bar. No receiving line but Captain Arma spoke to many people in the room. In theory, guests are supposed to sit only with their own group but there is no space for that to be rigidly observed. Similarly in the restaurants, people are dining in twos more than usual but there are also group tables. No official tables – last night’s formal was the first for many years where TSH and Diva had no invitation from a ship’s officer. Masks are compulsory indoors when not eating or drinking and this is rigidly observed and enforced. The crew wear masks all the time, which must be really uncomfortable. Butlers take guest temperatures each day, using a device pointed at the wrist. An element of ‘best of 3’ about this. TSH and Diva have both registered low on these tests and have then had it re-taken on the neck. So far so good.

The guests are making a defiant gesture to Covid. Never have so many sequins and sparkles been seen on board. Diva has a sparkly mask for formal nights.

 

The QR Quest

 After an uneventful drive, TSH and Diva arrived at the all-day pub which Diva had carefully selected for refreshments on arrival in Southampton. They now know that ‘all-day food’ is a relative term. They were ‘greeted’ at 11:05 with the news that breakfast was long finished and lunch would not start until 11:30. They were not even allowed to order any food until that time.

Embarkation procedures shore-side took just over an hour – much longer than usual but very well organised. They passed quickly through the first few stages of documentation checks despite TSH’s Big Mistake.

They both passed their Covid test, which was much less brutal than the kind which their local pharmacist supplied. The Northern test involves mirrors, torches, tonsils and many nasal centimetres. This one was a series of gentle swirls just inside the nose. Diva was relieved and impressed.

The Silversea check-in also took place in the terminal building. A woman was heard to say ‘can I go up to my suite on Deck 5 now?' The attendant gently reminded her that she would need to board the ship first.

Within minutes of boarding, TSH and Diva were greeted as old friends by waiters, a restaurant manager, the Commodore of the fleet (Captain Arma, who took them round South America) and, most importantly, the Head Sommelier. The latter invited them to a day-time wine tasting tomorrow but this does not sound like a healthy option.

The Big Mistake?  TSH does not trust his smartphone or his own ability to use it in a hurry. So all the documentation, including the NHS QR codes confirming double vaccination for both, was printed out. And just for extra assurance he had 2 copies of much of it – 1 in his zipped pockets and 1 in the suitcases. He offered 2 sheets of QR codes to the medical documentation desk, who were trained well enough to spot that both applied to him and there was not one for Diva. The suitcases with Diva’s QRs were by now deep into the luggage system and totally unavailable. He offered the NHS vaccination record cards instead but these are not acceptable as proof. A frantic search through both phones followed and Diva was extremely relieved when she tracked down her QR code. So was TSH – he knew he would not be embarking alone.

TSH’s defence: he sent an electronic link of both NHS QR codes to Diva to cover any subsequent problems. He did not expect the problems to be self-created.

Information drips out

 The Silversea website is still down. There is no real official explanation but guests are told that the Tech Department are working on it. TSH has been told verbally that the system was taken down in response to a threat and that no data is compromised. An unofficial communication included the words 'It takes longer to get a system back up than to take it down'. Really? Over a week? Contingency planning should cover such an eventuality. Diva has seen an online comment that Silversea need a new Tech Department.

TSH and Diva have now been sent information about the second leg of their cruise, confirming that it is another round of Britain. Or, to quote Silversea 'an immersive experience'. Which is an unfortunate turn of phrase from a cruise company. An interesting quirk is that the itinerary down the east coast visits Edinburgh before Dundee. A mistake or a scheduling issue with the ports? Watch this space. 

TSH has had his hair cut.